Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
