Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Randomize
