some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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