I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
