You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Randomize
