Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
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