Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Randomize
