Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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