ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
