the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
