This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Randomize
