Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Randomize
