Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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