yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
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