Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
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