she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
