Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
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