Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I'm gonna fight the coyote
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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