You just made me feel so damn special
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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