dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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