Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
