Umm I'm too high to move.
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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