As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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