so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
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