Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
