No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Randomize
