I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
