I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Randomize
