I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
