they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
