This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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