I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Randomize
