he thought i was a dude.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Randomize