so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Randomize
