So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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