At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
please come you make the beer taste better
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
