check it out our google latitudes are spooning
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
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