he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize