Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
