I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
