it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize