i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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