started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
