I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
