idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize