I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
