yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Randomize
