My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Go christen that room with your naked body.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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