Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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