I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
